Apparently I don't like to write things myself...

But I do like to link. So here's a fun tidbit: today's Borowitz Report.

BUSH TWINS CUT SHORT MIDEAST TRIP
Arab World Gives Thumbs Down to Spring Break-themed Diplomatic Mission

Just days after First Lady Laura Bush was heckled during her diplomatic mission to the Middle East, Bush twins Barbara and Jenna Bush cut short a Middle Eastern trip of their own as the White House acknowledged that sending the fun-loving twins to the volatile region was "a really bad idea."

The twins embarked earlier in the week on their diplomatic journey, which was to take them to Jordan, Saudi Arabia and Egypt, amid high hopes from the White House that the Arab world would fall in love with the president's high-spirited daughters.

Calling their trip "a mission to bring the fun and wild times of Spring Break to the Middle East," Jenna Bush told reporters upon arriving in Cairo, "We are going to show you Arabs how to party down, and I guarantee that this party will be off the hook!"

But the tour, which was jointly underwritten by the Halliburton Company and Michelob, hit a speed bump on its very first stop, when Barbara Bush's call to make Wednesday night Ladies' Night across the Middle East received harsh rebukes from political and religious leaders throughout the region.

Acknowledging that the Bush twins' Middle Eastern foray was an unmitigated fiasco, the White House said it would continue to reach out to the Arab world by dispatching two new American diplomats, Nascar driver Jeff Gordon and singer Kid Rock.

Elsewhere, John Bolton's bid to become the next ambassador to the United Nations suffered a setback today when People Magazine named him "Angriest Man Alive."

Yes, yes...long time no update....

You'd think with all the wild and exciting things that fill each and every one of my days, I would have many fascinating tidbits to share with my readers (reader?) on a regular basis. Obviously, I am just too engaged in the whirlwind that is my life. Or something.

But I did see a fabulously amusing item worth sharing today, courtesy my dear StinkyLu. Please check yesterday's entry on The Daily Fug, a rude yet scathingly brilliant foray into questionable fashion. While you're there, of course, do check the other entries. I should probably just put a darn link to The Daily Fug on my boy howdy links, but as one who could easily be featured on their parade of fugliness, if only I were more famous, I see a potential conflict of conscience.

Perhaps Another Chance for a Close Call

So, the Stones are going on tour again. Some people find this remarkable...or embarassing. Good grief, the boys are only in their 60s. It's not like they're dead.

I have a long history of almost seeing the Rolling Stones in concert. Some might call them near misses...don't ya love that term: near miss? It's often used to describe an event where two small planes or some cars or whatever narrowly avoid colliding, or crashing into a nuclear reactor... an accident that almost happened, which is to say it was actually a complete miss. But I digress. Anyway, in this case, a consistent series of unfortunate and/or amusing events has come between me and the old boys since the 70s. And there's no reason to stop that now. Not that I'd be likely to go, since the nearest venues are Phoenix and Denver. I know folks who've driven to Denver to see concerts (you know who you are, my dear children), but I'm apparently not all that dedicated. I do applaud their tenacity, however. I read somewhere that their last tour brought in around 88 million dollars. In which case, why would you ever stop touring? Old age is expensive.

Cinco de HoldTheMayo

I forgot to wish everyone a happy Star Wars Day yesterday (May the 4th be with you). Hope it was swell for one and all.

The sun has come out Up North, finally, so things are improving. One unfortunate development: the Culver's signs I have passed have altered the way they display the flavor of the day, no longer providing good fodder for my collection. Sad. But the search continues.

Cheese, Fireworks, Gifts

Thoughts of the day:

I need an updater monkey.

It is freezing here in Illisconsin. Freezing, truly.

Gas is 20 cents less in Belvidere than in ABQ. Y'all come on up and get you some.